“I can’t,” she said. “I’ve got to go to work that day.

She honestly sounded so down and depressed that I figured that she hated her job and asked her if she did. She said no… and went on so say… while it wasn’t the best job in the world, it was not the worst one either. From the look on her face, though, you’d think she was digging ditches or scraping gum off bathroom walls..

Of course, seeing this as an opportunity for growth… I asked her to try something: I said, “Instead of saying I’ve ‘got’ to go to work, say I ‘get’ to go to work.”

It made her smile, and I could tell that she was a little skeptical, but she promised to give it a try.

Changing “got” to “get” may seem really insignificant…and you might be wondering how this will change your situation….but the truth is: your thoughts (subsequently you words) create your reality.

What most people don’t realize is that we make our own happiness… however, at the same time, we make our life miserable, frustrating, etc. This all comes from the words we use to describe things.

The way that you choose to see a situation will definitely determine how you respond to it, both physically and emotionally.

Remember that your body takes cues very easily. Have you ever found that when you smiled, you actually started feeling happier? Even by changing something that minor, you are cuing your body to be more receptive and to enjoy itself more.

When you’re in a place where you’re feeling down about everything and discontent, be aware that this is something that can easily snowball on itself. You’ll find that when this happens, it is so easy to lose momentum and energy…and it can spiral out of control. This is where depression comes from… it’s just an ongoing choice to feel bad, then it gets worse and worse, until it ‘seems’ to be out of control.

Make a conscious choice to improve your attitude and the way that you see things.

Like the woman I talked to the other day, instead of saying that work is something that you’ve “GOT” to do, recognize it for a privilege and a joy – because it is. What’s the alternative???

There is something positive in the situation if only you can find it.
– Do you get to make other people happy during your job?
– Are you pleased to make the day easier for your co-workers?

It is true that not all of us have our ideal jobs, but there is definitely something bright to look for.

You could say that you have a job where people call in with complaints all day, or instead you can say that you have a job where you help people towards customer satisfaction. It’s all in how you view it.

Practical Application

Though this may sound the typical “half empty/half full” rhetoric… please don’t overlook this very important lesson.

Be aware of what you’re saying because it’s creating your reality “as you speak”.

I was at a store getting a few things, and as the young lady behind the counter was ringing up the order, she accidentally hit the wrong key, and apparently wiped the entire order out instead of tallying it up.

When she recognized that she did this, she hit the counter in disgust and said, “Dang, I’m so stupid for doing that!”

Of course, you know me; I saw this as a great opportunity to share some wisdom.

I banged on the counter the same way she did, and said “Dang, you’re so stupid for doing that!”

The look on her face went from frustrated and disappointed to a confused and angry look.

She ask, “Why would you say that to me?” I said “I’m just saying the same thing that you said to yourself….”

Her response was “Well, that’s different. YOU can’t go around saying that people are stupid… “I” can say whatever I want to say about myself. It’s just plain ole’ mean to go around telling other people that they’re stupid.”

Of course, this conversation was going down the exact path I wanted it to, because this opened up a great opportunity for learning and sharing with the young lady how powerful her words are.

I explained to her how the things she says to herself are exponentially more powerful than anything anyone else could say about her. However, she gives other people more validity when they are saying things about her.

The point I made was: she obviously didn’t get upset with herself for calling herself stupid, but she did get upset with me for saying the exact same thing. How ironic!

I went on to tell her that continuing to call herself stupid is a very self-defeating and destructive habit; because over time, she’ll start (subconsciously) believing that she’s stupid. And of course, she’ll end up attracting more situations that “proves she’s stupid”.

I told her that, by no means did I really think she was stupid…and that she shouldn’t either.

She thanked me…

I left

Practical Application

Be aware of the things you’re saying to yourself, because your word is way more powerful than anything anyone else could say about you.

Be very aware of any self defeating or negative self talk that you may be having about yourself.

Ask yourself “How would I respond if someone else were saying this about me?” The majority of the time, you’ll find that you would be angered or offended by someone else saying those exact things that you’re saying to yourself.

Keep that in mind the next time you come down on yourself for whatever reason.