Sending you love and light my dear friend.

That daughter of yours is just incredible and soooo adorable.

Shawn

P.S. most of the words in this message were repeats of what you just said, as a reminder as a reinforcer. I thought that might make you smile or laugh or both. Namaste’

xoxo

Love You Bro.

Peace.

Smac

You aren’t teaching your daughter low self worth.

You are holding her kindly, treating her kindly, speaking to her gently. And by these actions you are teaching her she deserves kindness, love and good treatment.

Get a grip, my brother. You are being a bit melodramatic.

Phil

Something bothers me, about what you said you experienced. You said, on your birthday you never felt so worthless.

But that’s not what bothered me. What bothered me was how you seemed to have reacted or responded to that feeling of worthlessness.

But let me give a little of my background, so you have at least a little idea of why your response to your feeling worthless bothered me.

I’m what many would call an old fart. I’m approaching 60 and I’ve been a conscious student of life for at least 30 or so years. (Before that I just took it for granted that life sucked, my life sucked, and anybody who seemed to be doing well was faking it, but their life actually sucked too. Well, I didn’t believe that entirely all the time, but I did believe it more and more until finally I got so depressed I wanted to just die. But ahh,… I had the good fortune to have a very tiny, tiny, tiny glimmer of a thought that, “Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe life can be better.” And, lo and behold, I began looking and things started ‘showing up’ and I learned things that absolutely turned my life around – 180 degrees – for the better. But now, let me get back to why I’m writing,… i.e., how your reaction to the experience of feeling worthless bothered me.)

One of the – what seems to me – very important things I’ve learned in my 30+ years of being a life student is:

How we feel is not necessarily an indication of how things are.

Another thing I’ve learned is:

When we feel poorly about ourselves it is almost always because we have a distorted, limiting, fundamentally incorrect and false idea of Who We Really Are or How THINGS Really Are.

So, let me explain how these concepts work, when a person feels worthless, for example. Let’s go back to your experience and let me try to show what is happening with it.

You feel very worthless.

But what then did you do? You tried to disprove the feeling. And how did you try to disprove the feeling? One of the ways was, you counted all the people who sent you Birthday Blessings. But let’s look at this.

Your decision or choice to do this you must have been coming from the premise (the belief) that: One’s worth is dependent on how one appears to others, or how others treat you.

Analyze this: If you didn’t believe your worth was DEPENDENT on the good opinions of others, you wouldn’t feel the LEAST bit worthless if no one appeared to care about you. So, what does this mean?

It means, at the time you felt worthless YOU caused the bad feeling, because you were experiencing a false idea of what constitutes your WORTH.

Let me try to give you examples, so that you can readily see how other people’s responses or opinions of you are completely IRRELEVANT, when it comes to your worth.

Suppose you are born in some Third World country and your mom is poor and cannot even feed you. Does this mean you aren’t worthy?

Or, suppose a child comes home from school one day, excited because he or she did unusually well in some test, and when s/he goes to tell mom or dad, mom and dad are freaking out because they can’t pay their bills and irritatedly respond with, “Can’t you see I’m busy here? Go out and play, or something.”

Does the parent’s response to the child’s desire to share their joy mean they aren’t worthy or deserving of kind attention?

Of course not.

If a person doesn’t have enough to eat, or a nice place to sleep, does this mean they aren’t worthy of it? Of course not.

How others treat us, or the conditions we experience are NOT determiners of our worth.

At least, not to me.

To me, Who We Really Are, are beings of Unconditional Worth. By that I mean, I believe each and every person is worthy and deserving of excellent, wonderful, happy, peaceful, joyful, meaningful, fulfilling lives.

Now, at this point, since you seem to have an inquisitive mind, I can imagine you asking, “If everyone is Unconditionally Worthy and Worthwhile and deserving of every good thing, why don’t we all experience this?”

A part of my answer is: Because we have come to BELIEVE ideas that blind us to being aware of and experiencing our Unconditional Worth. Let me explain that,…

Here you were, on your birthday. You experienced a bad feeling. You said you felt very worthless. But what did you do with that feeling?

You didn’t immediately say, “That can’t possibly be true.” No. Instead, you tried to look for EXTERNAL EVIDENCE for why that wasn’t true. But look at what that reaction means: It means you BELIEVE that your WORTH is DEPENDENT on EXTERNALS, e.g., how others treat you, how nice your circumstances are, what others are saying about you.

If, instead, you believed that your worth is NEVER AN ISSUE, you would have dealt with that bad feeling differently.

You see, MY belief about worth is: Every person is absolutely worthy of a completely wonderful life. Therefore, if someone is FEELING unworthy, they must be BELIEVING something about what constitutes WORTH that isn’t true.

Now, here’s another question you might now be asking: If every person’s worth is so Unconditionally Wonderful, why are so many people struggling? The general answer is: Most people BELIEVE ideas that blind them and OBSTRUCT them from experiencing reality abundantly, happily, peacefully, meaningfully and fulfillingly.

What are some of these limiting beliefs?

I’m not as worthy as someone else. (Translation: I am worthless – worth LESS than some other person.)
I am not beautiful.
I am not wonderful.
The Universe and/or God doesn’t care about me.
I’m not important.
I don’t have what it takes, whatever that is.

You see, no one can EARN or add one IOTA to their WORTH by what they do, or try to do.

The things we get, by getting people to approve of something we say or do, may add to our bank account or status. But they don’t change our worth.

For example, a baby who hasn’t earned a dime is not ‘worth less’ than, say, a rock star or famous politician. Isn’t that obvious? (But notice how people’s behaviors belie their blindness to this obvious fact.)

Most people spend an enormous amount of time, thinking, strategizing, energy and effort, on trying to EARN a feeling of WORTH. But it is not something to be earned; it is only something to be understood or REALIZED.

YOU CAN’T EARN A SENSE OF WORTH.

Do you see?

Our feelings tell us what we believe. That’s all they do.

If you don’t like the way you feel about something (or yourself) learn to question the feeling. It’s likely the bad feeling is the result of a mistaken, limiting belief. And that’s all it is. Discover the right belief and the bad feeling just goes away,… easy, with practically no effort required.

Now, do you agree or disagree? Do you think I’m just blowing smoke up your x or does what I say resonate?

Phil

love and respect.

tony d

i apologise for the lack of eloquence but i felt I was just watching myself when I hit excuses mode. You just gotta push past it breh, You are one of the few people that i really respect with the LOA stuff (which im not 100% sold on). Do it for yourself more than us..this who you are..never forget that.

Peace