Hugger, Not A Shaker

Typically, when I meet people for the first time (and thereafter) I give them a hug versus shaking their hands. Even if it’s that “manly” half-hug where you bump opposite shoulders for a half a second 🙂

I do this in my personal life and business interactions – men and women.

Usually people are ‘okay’ with it, but about 1 out of 10 people will be visibly “uncomfortable” or “weirded-out” by it.

Recently, someone asked me about this.. They asked me why I hugged everyone and if it had a negative impact with the people I’ve met.

I said, “I didn’t know.”

She seemed to be shocked by my response.

So she asked my I didn’t know.

I said, “Because I don’t care.”

She asked “why?”

My philosophy is: if people are “freaked-out” by my hugging them, they probably aren’t the people I want in my life.

She went into the diatribe about how I should be more aware of people’s feelings yadda, yadda, yadda…

I UNDERSTOOD what she was saying, but didn’t really agree…

So she asks, “So what if Richard Branson or some other billionaire wanted to meet you but were uncomfortable with you hugging them, you’d miss out on what they had to offer….”

I smiled and said, “You’re right.”

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So, I’m posing a few questions to my readers:

Is it weird to hug people that you don’t know…and what do you think about the idea of ‘not caring’ if people are freaked out about hugs??

Do you think it’s worth it to stop hugging people for the sake of “what they could offer you?”

Are You Imposing Suffering On Yourself (And Others)?

You can learn a lot about someone based on their conversation. I was in Wal-Mart the other day, just running around with Aria. A lady walked by talking to another lady and chuckled, “I love to see when dads suffer for a change.”

Hmmm..

I was running behind Aria, keeping her from puling things from the shelves, pushing the shopping cart and talking on the phone simultaneously but I would not come anywhere near calling it suffering. I was actually having a good time.

I would say with 99.9% certainty that this woman lives what “I” would consider a miserable life.

Why?

Because people talk about what they’re thinking about…or what their perception of things are.

You’ve heard the phrase, “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.” It’s so true. It’s all about perception.

She saw what I was going through as ‘suffering’ because SHE would have felt that way about HER experience.

What are some of the things you think about and talk about that you’re imposing ‘suffering’ on yourself.

Do you plop down on the couch after work and say, “I’m dead tired!” ?
When you’re feeling ill, do you declare, “I’m as sick as a dog!” ?

Practical Application

There are tons of phrases we use freely that impose suffering on ourselves.

Be aware of the things you’re saying about yourself and others. Make sure they’re the phrases that are attractin what you want and not what you don’t want.